NEPTUNE

159,97 DKK

Looks calm. Isn’t. Neptune’s that friend who seems Zen but is secretly spiraling at 2,000 km/h. Beneath the perfect blue is pure chaos: storms, diamonds, and drama on a planetary scale. This poster is a love letter to beautiful disasters: proof that you can look peaceful, glow effortlessly, and still be absolute mayhem inside.

Don’t Sunbathe It

Posters love light… just not that much light. Keep it out of direct sunlight unless you’re into that washed-out, vintage look.

Frame It, Maybe?

Frames aren’t just for rich art collectors. They keep your poster flat, clean, and safe from the horror of accidental coffee spills.

Dust, Don’t Crust

A gentle wipe with a dry, soft cloth once in a while is enough. No, your mop does not qualify. And please… don’t use cleaning spray. It’s paper, not your kitchen counter.

Roll Responsibly

Moving? Roll it loosely and stick it in a cardboard tube. Don’t fold it. Folds are forever, just like bad tattoos.

Climate Control (For Posters, Not Your Mood)

Keep it in a dry, cool place. Humidity makes posters wrinkle like raisins. Basements and bathrooms? Hard no.

Recycle the Right Way

If, for some unholy reason, you stop loving it... don’t trash it. Donate, swap, or recycle.

The posters clean up nice with a sturdy wooden frame, already kitted out to hang straight on your wall (because wrestling with nails is overrated).

Ready-to-hang: Comes with the hanging kit, so you can skip the assembly drama.

Frame Material: Solid pine wood. Tougher than it looks.

Frame Size: Chunky enough to last (20-25mm thick), sleek enough to look good (1014mm wide).

Paper Weight: Heavyweight 200 gsm (a solid 80 lb), because floppy posters are a tragedy.

Paper Finish: Smooth matte, zero glare. No accidental mirror selfies here.

Protection: Shatterproof plexiglass, because accidents (and clumsy friends) happen.

Sustainability: FSC-certified or equivalent, so your conscience can relax.

On-Demand Magic: No warehouses, no dust. Printed fresh and shipped just for you.

If you only buy a Poster:

You get the artwork, printed in high quality, rolled up safely in a tube. No frame, no extras, just pure visual goodness waiting to hit your wall.

If you buy a Framed Poster

Same high-quality print, but this time it comes already living in a sleek frame (ready to hang the moment it arrives).

CAN I RETURN MY ORDER IF I CHANGE MY MIND?

Yep! EU law gives you a 14-day “cooling-off” period. So if you unpack your poster and decide it’s not love at first sight, you can send it back within 14 days. No hard feelings.

How do I start a return?

Just drop an email at hello@distinctroom.com with your order number. We’ll send you the return address and next steps.

Who pays for return shipping?

Changed your mind? You cover the return shipping.

Got a damaged, misprinted, or wrong item? That’s on me. I will replace it free of charge or refund you in full.

My poster arrived damaged. What now?

Snap a quick photo and email it to me (hello@distinctroom.com) within 30 days. I will sort it out with a free replacement (or a refund if you’d rather). Easy.

What if my order never shows up?

If your package takes a holiday and gets lost in transit, I will send you a new one. No extra cost, no stress.

When will I get my money back?

Once your return lands back with me (or you show us proof it’s on the way), I will refund you to your original payment method. Usually within 14 days, but often faster.

Can I swap for another design instead?

Not directly. Since everything is printed on demand, the quickest way is: return your poster → get a refund → place a shiny new order.

Are your posters considered personalized?

Nope! All designs are my own creations, not customer-customized. That means they are returnable under EU law. If we ever launch personalized prints, those would be non-returnable (but we’ll make that super clear).

How do I reach you?
Email: hello@distinctroom.com

For the very specific details, read the Return Policy, available at the bottom of the page under "Terms and Conditions".

Beauty is pain

The quiet one. The pretty one. The one that looks like serenity itself: soft blue, smooth edges, the celestial equivalent of good lighting. You’d think she’s the calm friend in the solar system group chat, just floating peacefully at the edge, unbothered. A walking meditation soundtrack.

Yeah… no.

That perfect blue? Methane. The “calm”? A façade. Underneath that hypnotic glow, Neptune is absolute chaos. Winds blowing at over 2,000 kilometers an hour, the fastest in the solar system. Storms the size of continents appear, vanish, then come back just to remind everyone she’s still got it. It rains diamonds, for crying out loud... not gently either, but in a violent, 8,000-kilometer-deep hailstorm of crushed carbon. If beauty is pain, Neptune’s basically a cosmic fashion show in hell.

Charming chaos

But isn’t that the charm? We fall for the surface that soft blue glow, that impossible stillness because we need to believe that something that pretty must be peaceful. We forget that sometimes the most stunning things are the ones barely holding themselves together. Neptune doesn’t pretend otherwise; she just spins sideways, minding her business, radiating twice as much heat as she gets, proving you can look cold while still burning inside.

And come on... Neptune. The name alone? Cool AF. You can’t compete with that level of cool. God of the sea, ruler of storms, the one who turned calm into power and chaos into poetry. Even the name sounds like it deserves a soundtrack.

You're not going to believe this...

Sustainable Print

Printed on FSC approved paper, 200gsm.

Details matter

Personality and uniqueness with every piece.

Part of a bigger picture

Stories, not just posters.

A PURCHASE WITH BENEFITS

Sure, you’re just buying a poster. But in the process, you’re also rescuing your wall from eternal boredom and casually planting a tree. Basically, you’re a philanthropist now. Congratulations on being both stylish and morally superior.

THE SOLAR COLLECTION:

They’ve always needed each other: the Sun blazing life into our days, the Moon turning empty nights into poetry. The solar collection transforms blank walls into galaxies. And because celestial bodies love generosity, you get 10% off when 2 or more align in your cart.

Explore the Solar Collection

In case your walls are still too naked...

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